Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Miss Sue Says.

aspen peekaboo
like toddlers at storytime
tuesday morning
glimpsing faces and yellow
laughing spaces between
chubby fingers
thinning leaves
falling
too quickly
to catch

17 comments:

  1. Upon my return from Colorado we did swirl with tissue paper leaves until the whole room was covered with Aspen like leaves...falling falling all around on the ground...chubby fingers clapping with glee. I always pray that the mothers will realize how quickly this "season" will pass, fleeting like falling leaves.

    Miss Sue

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  2. "Laughing spaces between chubby fingers"

    ...so good Erin. Cheers!

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  3. Poetry? You have time to write poetry?

    Get your A$$ out on the water! There are fish to catch!

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  4. Miss Sue - I'm glad (and honored) that I got you first as "storytime lady." :) e

    Sanders - Many thanks, as always my friend!

    Tim - And you have time to read it...

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  5. A fine read this autumn evening.

    Nicely done, Miss Sue and e.m.b

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  6. reading it, the last three lines run together so quickly it is as if the reader is falling off the poem before they realize it is done, just like the leaves. short and sweet. great one!

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  7. Hmm, if you take lines 3 through 6, it's nearly a Haiku....slightly more syllables, but you've got the season in other lines. I like the image from the last three lines....life is ephemeral, and slips away quickly.
    Nicely done, Erin.
    Mike

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  8. If I knew what poignant meant, I would use it here! :-)

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  9. Nice...I can almost picture the golden aspen leaves falling to the ground. Fall is a wonderful time of year , if only winter wasn't so close on it's heels.

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  10. Brk Trt - Many thanks, as always...

    d.nash - I'm glad that worked -- wanted it to read that way! Cheers!

    ShouldFishMore - Thanks, Mike...

    FlyFishingCrazy - Well.....thanks! ;)

    HighPlainsFlyFisher - I agree, fall is my favorite season, and sadly, it's the shortest!

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  11. Part sonnet, part haiku- I like. Do you teach classes? Because every time I visit here, I feel like a gibbering idiot. Cahill says you can't teach writing- you either have it or you don't. You have it Erin. Thank you.

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  12. FR - Cahill is right. It's not something you can teach. In music training, "expression" and "interpretation" were not things that could be taught either...and I never had them. I just didn't have it, and tried to learn...and while I got "better" it wasn't where I found my voice. I still don't know I've found it here....but thanks for the good words!

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  13. Erin- you've found your voice, and we all want to hear it. You're half the reason I don't post anymore, the other half is work and exhaustion. If I could turn on your dissociative voice, and write my stream-of-consciousness like you do.... start writing your book already, I could care less about Geirach and McGuane...

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  14. And all the toddlers would yell, "Do it again! Do it again!" So can all you gentlemen help tape the leaves back up?
    Thanks,
    Miss Sue

    P.S. Ditto on the book encouraging and Erin be sure to include many tie-ins to the farm days...stories of interest abound there in your mind.

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  15. FR - Wow. Now I feel horribly guilty for my 'half.' But thanks for those kind words, sir! Book, book, book...perhaps winter hibernation will make it so.

    sgb - Do it again, do it again! hehe. I can hear them in my head. And I'll never be able to escape the farm stories and references. ;)

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