Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Face Down.

walking against a current
of lunch breakers
cyclists and joggers
heading away
from downtown
on the bike path
as a mob with fire
in their bellies

I stay on the dirt
side blindside
going the wrong direction
but the right way
close to the creek
and the pool
that two weeks ago
drowned a homeless man
face down
staring at trout
just like I’m doing now

26 comments:

  1. Dark. I almost had to reread it. It's moving though, I like it.

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  2. Thanks, One Bug...glad you did.

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  3. I'm with OneBug, the part with the drowned man caught me a little off gaurd.

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  4. Kiwi - In Boulder Creek running through town, this happens at least a couple times a year.

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  5. Very nice...Just like a trout, facing the wrong way is the right way. Glad to see you've been moving upstream.

    Cheers!

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  6. "going the wrong direction
    but the right way"


    I hope that, upon my passing, such words are said.

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  7. Sanders - "just like a trout." I really like thinking of it that way -- holding against the current -- thanks for giving me the image!

    Mike - I had not thought of it as eulogistic...but now I hope it's said of me as well.

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  8. good twist - like frodo staring into the waters... hypnotizing. bhive

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  9. bhive - rings and waters...both, dangerous things.

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  10. "going the wrong direction
    but the right way"

    that should be a bumper sticker

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  11. Wow. Nice one. I love to see you crafting poetry. As you know, poetry is in the eye of the beholder. It can be hit and miss depending on who is reading it. This one hits.

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  12. Dustin - Now that you say it...yeah, it should be! Although would be a dangerous mindset for one-way streets. ;)

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  13. Jim - Thank you so much for the kind words. I find writing poetry to be really difficult...it feels like the New York Times crossword puzzle stretching and aching my brain....on a Sunday. But such things are good for us, I'm told...and I'm happy this one hit.

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  14. I'm often Face Down and Staring at Trout. So far I've managed not to drown and for that I am thankful. Keep on going the right way and thanks for sharing.

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  15. I am
    not smart enough
    to enjoy
    poetry

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  16. To some degree, it reminds us that we are all figments, or imaginations of carbon molecules. Destined to stare at trout, the ground, or some other less attractive feature for eternity. We won't know it of course, we'll be joining the billions of those preceding us. The homeless man in the creek, and the tycoon in his crypt will be the same, the only difference in the memories of those left, who remember the lives. Then that is gone too.
    It's a comforting thought, don't you think? That we have our time, then move on.but not one to dwell on, there is so much to do while we breath.
    Cheers, Erin.
    Mike

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  17. Hmm...wasn't prepared for the direction this took on those last 4 lines. But having visited CO a few times and seeing the homeless population, I can picture this entire scenario. Nice writing Erin!

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  18. The first thing I thought of was fishing on Boulder Creek. Very vivid picture Erin.

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  19. Mysticfish - Thanks for stopping by...and I will try!

    Tim - I think you just created it. ;)

    Mike - I do think it a comforting thought. Yes, indeed. And the bottom of a river would not be a bad end in my mind. Cheers, my traveling friend...

    JGR - Thanks for stopping by! And yeah, the homeless population along Boulder Creek has gotten out of control in the past years. Makes it always interesting to fish.

    Cofisher - You nailed it. And thanks!

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  20. You don't have to get that close to see the trout. Maintain a healthy distance from the underside of the water.

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  21. I feel the mystery and a little darkness and truth in this poem ..Er..I even feel like I'm reading an Edgar Allen Poe...story..:)

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  22. Steve - I'm trying to keep my head above water...

    Capt.M.Rich - The truth, although most often portrayed as light and dazzling prophetic rays, is, I'm finding, more akin with darkness. (And Poe? Wow! Thanks!)

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  23. Like it, don't follow the crowds like sheep. Against the flow. It's the way to go. (My own bit of weak poetry) Like to read it, can't write it.

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  24. Phillip - Many thanks, and I'm glad you liked it! "Against the flow. It's the way to go."...sounds like you have a poet's heart to me!

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  25. It reminds me of my attempts to escape the 'madding crowd', when I go fishing. Peace and solitude should go hand in hand with fishing.
    Beautiful, as ever.
    BB.

    (R.I.P. The Homeless Man - hope you got there, my friend).

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    Replies
    1. BB - Peace, solitude...with fishing it is never lonely. Thank you, as always, my friend...

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